Notice that I did not say gamer girls. There is a difference between the two. Gamer girls are obvious in what they are about. They dress to get noticed, and pose for pictures either with games, consoles, or in cosplay. But, even though they try to look like they belong in the gaming community, all they care about is preying upon what they think is an easy demographic, as they try to get attention. If you try to actually talk about what they’re dressing up as, or posing with, they’ll be clueless and bored. And of course, if you’re bored then you’re boring (so says Harvey Danger).
Now, that said, just because gamer girls are pointless does not make them useless. Just like celebrities, if you keep your distance and just enjoy them for what they are, you won’t get disappointed. If you’re the kind of person that likes looking at a sexy female Mario, then you’re in luck! Enjoy it and move on.
Girl gamers are different, but not mutually exclusive. Girl gamers can still pose in cosplay, or with their favorite game or console, and it’s just them expressing an interest in their hobby. There’s nothing wrong with that. But from a distance it can be hard to tell the two apart; if you meet one on the internet, you are automatically at a distance, and it becomes virtually impossible. And guys really like girls who are into games, so they give them a chance, and get horribly disappointed when they get asked for their credit card. This is why gamer girls get a lot of hate. And that sucks, but as long as gamer girls are posing as girl gamers… you’re not going to get away from that.
But we’re off topic. Why do I hate actual girl gamers? It’s because they feel like they don’t need to prove themselves, when they really really do. And it is more than just distinguishing yourself from a gamer girl. So much more.
Where should I even begin? To start, let’s talk about the gamer title. To earn the title of gamer, no matter who you are, you need to be invested in the hobby to a certain level. As a comparison, owning a bicycle does not automatically make you a cyclist. I like to ride my bike from time to time. Some people even ride to work or school. That still doesn’t qualify you as a cyclist. Cyclists wear ridiculous outfits and love neon colors. They have bicycle racks on their cars, because… you can’t get anywhere riding your bike? I don’t know, they’re crazy, but the point is they are serious about their hobby. So if the only games you play are on the bus on your phone, you don’t get to call yourself a gamer.
And there’s nothing elitist or exclusionary about that. I’ve gotten into fights with my brother, I don’t call myself a mixed martial arts boxer. I drive a car, I’m not a racecar driver. I’ve made a sandwich, I’m not a chef. Well, funny story, I actually am a chef, but still, it’s not because I make dinner once in a while.
So the title of gamer has to be earned; it doesn’t matter if you’re male or female. And you don’t need to be the best in the world, or even competitive. You can play casually, on your own, and still be a gamer. But if you call yourself one, I’m going to challenge you on it. Not because I don’t believe you could be one, and not because I don’t want you to be one, but because I do want you to be one. You just need to prove it.
Imagine I’m on a dating website and I see a girl who claims video games as one of her hobbies. My first thought is not, “oh wow, I wonder what games she plays!” Instead, I’m thinking, “I’ll bet she just put that on there because she thinks that’s what guys want to hear.” And here’s the thing. Most guys do want to hear that. Not all guys are into games, but a lot are, and they would love someone who shares that hobby. But you know what? They can love someone who doesn’t just as much. If they get all excited about your shared interest, and then find out that really you just play candy crush from time to time? They’re going to feel like you lied to them, and that’s doing the opposite of what you wanted by claiming it in the first place.
And I see this a lot, not just from gamer girls. It’s like when people get excited to see Mario or Pikachu or Sonic, but they’ve only played the games maybe one time for a few minutes. Which is part of the reason why I’m really really tired of seeing Mario everywhere. There’s nothing wrong with him, but I’d rather see just about any other gaming character. And I’m not talking hipster level, nobody knows about this character kind of obscurity. I just mean scratch the surface of the hobby even a little bit.
Now, why don’t guys face this challenge? A few reasons. First of all, I don’t see guys in their underwear cuddling Nintendo cartridges. It just doesn’t happen. Secondly… guys do face this challenge. It happens all the time. But when challenged on their gaming aptitude, it usually gets into a competition about who knows more, or plays better, and it’s not about whether either guy is a gamer, but which is a better one. And often ends up with some head to head gameplay, and fun for everyone. But, of course, sometimes you get this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AFrQ1_2bbsI
Gaming has become much more of a mainstream thing than it was thirty years ago, and people who have no clue what they’re talking about are trying to get in on it. And that’s great, they should, and hopefully they find something they enjoy. But when an advertising company tries to sell me dishwashing liquid using 16-bit pixel art (I made that example up, otherwise I’d show a picture), and movies are taking advantage of the “retro” style, and it is clear that those who decided this and created this have no clue what it’s supposed to look like, it comes off as super disingenuous and greedy. They’re trying to take advantage of a demographic that they know nothing about, because they’ll do anything or claim to be anything if there’s money in it.
Gamer girls face that same challenge. There are tons of girls who play games. There are lots of girls who are really into it, and are really good at them. Some are competitive, others are casual, and all of them are fine. But when a girl claims to be a gamer, gets asked about what games she’s into, and responds with, “I don’t have to prove myself to you,” we’re going to have a problem.
And no, you don’t have to explain it to me. You can do anything you want. You can keep it a secret for all I care. But note that this hypothetical girl claimed to be a gamer first. She is the one who wants me to believe that she is a gamer. So clearly she cares what others think about her, and then she does have to prove it.