Why I Hate Pandemic Scares

People are stupid.  They just are. And when stupid people get scared, somehow they manage to do even more stupid things.

There is currently a particularly dangerous virus making its way around the world.  This is a fact. So, precautions need to be taken to help prevent it from spreading.  That’s fine. But what is actually happening? Madness.

Hand sanitizer is sold out everywhere.  And while I can sort of understand that, you can always just…  wash your hands? So there’s no reason to panic. Moreover… Hand sanitizer is just alcohol in a gel.  So… It’s easy to make more. And even if somehow every supplier of medical rubbing alcohol sells out, if you’re really desperate, you can just use vodka.  I’m hearing that people are also buying vinegar. Acid kills germs too. You know what? It’s really easy to clean things, and kill germs. If you do what you’re supposed to be doing normally, you can kill germs.  But ultimately, if you catch it it’s not going to be because you didn’t have sanitizer. Even if you do have it, it’s going to be that one random person who didn’t even know they had it yet, who stepped too close and sighed too heavily, and one little germ was in the air and you breathed it in.

My favorite thing from this whole experience so far has been when I inadvertently saw news on TV, and they were talking about the proper way to wash your hands.  And on social media, I’m seeing people post catchy songs or their favorite tunes to hum in order to wash your hands for the proper amount of time (M-m-m-myyyyyy Corona).  But… Didn’t we all learn this when we were three years old? It’s disturbing that people don’t know how to do something so basic; do we need to go over the steps involved in breathing again?

But I’ve heard that people are fighting over toilet paper.  People are hoarding it. It’s like… the most basic, cheap, easy to produce thing in the world.  It gets used every day, and never runs out. It’s not as though bombs are dropping and it will never be made ever again.  And I don’t know about you, but toilet paper rarely makes it onto my shopping list. Why? Because I buy a 24 pack, and it lasts a good few months, at least.  It’s cheaper in bulk, doesn’t spoil; why would anyone not have a supply already?  I’m probably good for another 6-months, not because I’m hoarding anything, but just because it’s something you don’t want to run out of under normal circumstances. By the time I run out, this whole thing will probably all be over.  Or we’ll all be dead. Either way I have enough.

But, of course, now that people are hoarding it, the stores are all out.  It’s one of those things that isn’t a problem until people think it’s a problem, and then they make it a problem.  There’s no problem so bad that stupid people can’t make it worse.

The stock market is a similar thing.  With meetings being cancelled, and temporary closures, and all of that, naturally the market is going to take a hit.  But because of that everyone tried to bail all at once, and the hit it takes just gets way worse. The stock market only exists because people believe it will work.  It’s a really fragile, ephemeral thing, and it only takes a tiny scare to watch it fall to the ground. People are really good at making things worse. So we’ve had record-breaking drops.  Really impressive ones. I guess people really needed to liquidize some assets so they could buy toilet paper.

My second favorite part of all of this are the empty stores.  We’ve already talked about toilet paper, but other things I noticed were out of stock: vinegar, zucchini, bananas, potatoes, eggs, ground beef, chips, pasta, tomato sauce, canned vegetables.  Now, if you’re hoarding, I can understand the canned foods, and pasta — those last a long time. I can even understand the vinegar (for sanitation purposes), potatoes (last a decent while) and maybe chips (they also can last a long time, but… not exactly something nutritious you need to stock up on), but…  bananas? They don’t last long. Ground beef? It has so much surface area, it’s really good at attracting bacteria, and is ultra-perishable.  Why would you stock up on perishable goods?!

And I’m not trying to make light of the situation.  Not really. A little levity and rational thinking is good for you, but I am taking this seriously.  People have died, and more will. But people die from the flu every year, so let’s try to keep this in perspective.  This mostly affects the elderly, weak, and imuno-compromised part of the population. If that is not you, you’re likely going to be fine, even if you do catch it, and the steps you take to keep it from spreading are to protect others..  If that is you, then stay at home and don’t let strangers in, and you’ll be fine.

Officials are taking this seriously, closing borders, and getting information out, banning large groups of people from meeting.  So imagine the flu that people normally get. It doesn’t affect everyone every year. And this year, with this virus, everyone is isolating themselves and taking it very seriously.  You’re now way less likely to catch it than you would a normal flu.

Should we take this seriously?  Yes, if not for ourselves than for those who are more vulnerable.   But should we panic? Please. There’s no reason. But, people are stupid, so here we are.

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